What a taste Riptide Rush Gatorade is
The Best Gatorade Flavors, Ranked And Reviewed By When You Need It The Most For Hydration
Brandon Wenerd / BroBible
Before I lay out my ultimate guide to the best Gatorade flavors based on their situational qualities, I want to make something clear. I don’t hear the shouts from some new-wave NARP flavor fanatic yelling some hogwash about “cucumber lime” or “strawberry kiwi” being the GOAT of all Gatorade flavors. Or how G2 “changed the game” when it comes to a list of best Gatorade flavors.
The random Gatorade flavors that have emerged over the years that pop up at obscure delis and random gas stations every once and a while can be tasty. But, they have no business in this power ranking of best Gatorade flavors.
Here at BroBible, we are dealing with the best day-to-day Gatorade flavors that you can get almost anywhere - the Gatorade flavors that everyone not living under a rock for the last 20 years knows, and more or less has an opinion on.
I will be ranking the top Gatorade flavors based upon their situational readiness to quench your thirst when you need it. That’s the ultimate goal of drinking Gatorade, after all: To quench your thirst when you need it the most. The purpose of this list is to narrowing down what flavor is best for each type of thirst.
So, I will take into consideration the gravity of the situation and parallel it with a Gatorade flavor’s magnitude. There is a time and place for each Gatorade flavor, and I'm about to let you know what those are.
If you don’t think there’s a time and a place for a specific Gatorade flavor, just ask yourself this: would you drink Corona around a campfire? Would you drink Guinness on a boat? Would you drink Molson on the 4thth of July? The answer to all of these questions is obviously a big, fat NO.
Without further adieu, here’s a ranking of the best Gatorade flavors based on their use in everyday life for hydration.
Brandon Wenerd / BroBible.com
Coming in first place is with out a doubt Glacier Freeze (light blue).
This flavor is easily the most diverse thirst quencher. If Juul put out a Glacier Freeze pod, I think we all know that it would end up being the Pineapple Express of pods. Hung-over? Glacier Freeze. Spicy food? Glacier freeze. Just thirsty? Glacier Freeze. The sweet taste of this heavenly elixir never gets old. From mixing our parents vodka with it, to drinking it to stay alive through an all night finals week Adderall binge. Glacier Freeze never lets us down.
Next up we have the original Gatorade designed and engineered to quench the thirst of the 1965 Florida Gators: Lemon Lime (yellow). Yellow Gatorade was literally designed to be consumed while exercising. If you're going to practice, a game, or the gym, you better have an ice-cold lemon lime on deck.
Yellow is not only for when you're exercising, it's for when you're sick. Not hungover-on-the-couch-and-trying-to-rally sick. But actually sick, with a fever and the shakes. Like, can't get out of bed so you ask your girl to bring you a yellow Gatorade because its literally all your stomach can handle. These are two HUGE reasons are why Lemon Lime is the second greatest Gatorade flavor of all time.
Brandon Wenerd / BroBible.com
Riptide rush (light purple) is a fantastic and versatile flavor. Riptide Rush is night owl juice. I feel like whenever I'm buying a Gatorade at night, it better be light purple. Got a 9 PM intramural basketball game? Riptide rush. Road trip? Riptide rush. Something about being on the move makes my pallet yearn for some light purple. There is also something about it that says “I’m relaxed” I’m going to take my time drinking this… I’m not super thirsty right now, but I know I will need a sip of something eventually.
Coming in fourth in Gatorade situational quality and thirst readiness is orange.
Oh, Orange Gatorade ... It seems like the only good time for Orange Gatorade is out of a paper cup on the sideline or in the dugout. It has to be freezing cold for it to be refreshing. Is it terrible? No. But drinking an Orange Gatorade is casually grounds for being called a weirdo. Orange just doesn't have enough oomph to get it higher. There’s just not enough times where it beats the rest of the flavors to the front line of thirst quenching.
Brandon Wenerd / BroBible.com
Up next we have the motor oils of all flavors: Cool blue other Fierce Grape. The name “Cool Blue” is deceiving because it sounds smooth and elegant. But in reality it tastes as if each sip weighs 10 pounds. Cool blue is bloating, filling, and has a drowsy effect. What is it, decaf Gatorade?
I put Cool Blue (dark blue) half a notch above Fruit Punch only because it does not leave a red rainbow on your mustache. Everything that can be said about Cool Blue can also be said about Fierce Grape (dark purple). There's just no getting around the fact that these flavors are second tier; the equivalent to the music fraternity on campus. Lame.
Y’all really drink the red Gatorade by choice? 🤢
- Ian (@ian_ambani) September 18, 2018
Lastly, I'm not going to be around the bush when I tell you that Fruit punch (red) is by far, undoubtedly, the worst Gatorade flavor. Now, I know some folks who live and die by the punch. But I think we all know that those people suck. It's a juice box flavor of Gatorade. That being said ... if your first choice is the devil-piss we call Red Gatorade, then I'm just going to assume that your favorite band is Daughtry and that wear a beanie when it's hot out.
Red Gatorade is flat out child’s play. The last time I had a red Gatorade my mom brought it to me on the baseball diamond when I was 9 years old ... and she thought she was doing me a favor. Absolutely no situation directs my thirst towards Fruit Punch. I would rather drink a Red Berry-flavored Capri Sun that's been marinating in the sun since 2007.
Honorable mentions:Glacier Cherry (white). This flavor is a fantastic second-string player, the best 6th man in the league. When you're picking up two Gatorades. You can't go wrong with snagging a Crisp Glacier Cherry for your second round pick.
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